Super Pressure!

So yesterday was Super Bowl Sunday and my first real test when put under pressure. Went to the home of my friends the Jones to watch the Super Bowl, They served up Pizza, Hot Dogs and Chilli, Cherry Pie and Chocolate chip Ice Cream.  Avocado Dip was also on the menu..A personal favorite of mine.  I brought Broccoli and baby carrots, some cheese cubes and corn chips.  I also brought a vitamin water and skipped the Pop.  I made a plate up of the veggies, some Avocado dip, some corn chips. Later I dug out a few Cherry's from the pie.   I did not finish my plate.
I feel really good about this.  Our culture is so food based and we use every Holiday and occasion to justify our over indulgence, thats O.K if you are healthy and of a normal waistline, but if you are Diabetic it is a dangerous and deadly way to celebrate.  Every time we let go and say, well its Christmas, or its your friends birthday, or its Fat Tuesday, or its the big game, or just this once....Almost everyday can be somebody's occasion  to celebrate, our co-workers bring in a big plate of cookies they just baked, The boss brings in bagels,  You get the picture.  For a diabetic this is such an issue, because I know from personal experience the vow I take in the morning to make the right choices has gone right out the window as soon as the pressure builds and the goodies are right in front of my face!
A diabetic can and will fail under the intense pressure to indulge coming from people who just don't realize the harm in saying, "Oh just go ahead, its only one"  or the hurt look they will give you when you just won't take their labor of love that they brought in to share with you.  So you give in, your morning resolution broken, and the rest of the day you blow, because you have already slipped up and you will restart your diet tomorrow, until its Susie Co-workers Birthday, and it would be rude of you to skip out of the fun!
I have been there and done it for so many years, This loss of self control that has led me to experience the worst five months I have ever experienced. It is the pain and the reality check that I am going to places with this disease that I may not be able to pull back from.  I have felt helpless and have thought about my funeral.  I had .begun the process of giving in and giving up.
But I am a fighter, I am a faithful person, and a survivor.  I am not going to give up without a fight!  I have way to many things to do and finish.  Already the  first steps I have taken, although not perfect, has began to relieve my pain, in just a few days.  Am I mentally strong enough to  resist the PRESSURE ?  I am writing this blog to be brutally honest with myself, to share my ups and downs. Next time I will start to write about more of the changes I am trying to do.  Thanks for looking in,    Mrs Cook