Ranting about How much I HATE diabetes.!!! How it affects a child, and what can we do about it!

Be prepared I am angry, I am going on a rant!    I HATE this disease with all of the passion I can muster, it is an awful waster of life, it hurts, and I Hate it!
  From the time when I was a small child I became aware of Diabetes when my Grandma would stay over  usually in my room, and she would shut the door to us to give herself the SHOT.   Inevitably I would see the blood spot on my bed, How terrifying to a small child.  Then my Mom and all that she went through, and put us all through trying to deal with the mood swings she would have and the pent up frustration. I did not realize what was happening at the time, but medications were new then, and I am sure that as hard as we have it now, thirty years ago it had to be so much worse!   My Grandma was only 60 when she died.   My husbands childhood with a mother with Diabetes was worse then mine, she also had Diabetes and was out of control for a good part of his life.  I remember she had to wear a boot because her ankle rolled over and she could not walk without it.  She was also legally blind.  Had she not died at 60, after a fall down the stairs trying to get to the hospital, she would have faced certain amputation and kidney dialysis.  AWFUL!   
    In my own experience I have felt a pent up frustration and felt the need to EXPLODE at times, I used to tell my son to run, when he was little, because I would get the same rage build up, but I accepted that it was my fault and I recognized the signs, I would tell him "  MOMMY  is Sick"   Thank God I did blame myself when I felt that way, it wasn't anybody elses  fault that I ate garbage and blew my diet, I did get up to 2oo pounds.  It was a miserable way to live, and I was not even officially Diabetic yet.   
    I was so convinced my life would be terrible if I could not eat what everybody else was eating, Cookies , Cake , Pizza, Hostess fruit pies, chips ,McDonalds Happy Meals,  I just did not get it. And you hate yourself because you are too weak to resist and you feel like a total failure!
   Another Rage I have is some of the Dr.s  I remember  one saying " Well just be glad you don't have cancer!"  Now I know how bad cancer is, its horrible too, but here is a disease that kills you slowly, robbing you of your sight, your legs, causing intense pain, steals your kidneys, causes heart attack and strokes, Robs you of your functions. Takes away your loved ones!  Its a "FAT PERSONS DISEASE!!!!"  "YOU CAN MANAGE IT AND MAKE IT ALL GO AWAY IF YOU JUST DIET AND EXERCISE!!  You can stick needles in your belly and legs and prick your fingers hundreds of times in a year and you just take it and be HAPPY!!!!!
   
Now this rant and these tears are NOT  for me!  They are for my Little hero, He is  four years old and now he has to take Shots not just once a day, but up to four times a day now!   His sugar numbers are excelerating rapidly.  I just feel so bad about this,  I am an adult and I hate this all so much, he is just a little child, and its NOT FAIR!!!   I hate this GOD AWFUL DISEASE!!!  He has done nothing to deserve this, hes not obese, he has no other members of his family with this disease!   
   
Now how can we turn our outrage into something beneficial?  I am going to look into the JUVENILE DIABETES FOUNDATION, and see what I can do to help.  I feel very strongly about this and I will be posting some links as I find out more!   


When I started this blog I intended to be honest about my feelings, some days are up and some days are down,  I want to be O.K and I really want this little angel in my life to be O.K .  


We are put on earth to do the will of God, and humble ourselves with our time and money.  This would be a wonderful cause, and I am going to get serious about it.    Thanks for looking in Mrs Cook